motivation – The Great Kaysby

Stop and Watch the Animals

What skills or lessons have you learned recently?

In a fast paced, almost always connected world, the most important lesson is to stop and watch the animals. Today, we seized the day, and we went to the zoo instead of doing our typical homeschool day. One of the best parts of the day was when we sat and ate snacks while watching the lions and giraffes! Watching them filled me with such a sense of calm and peace. The feeling was enhanced by the warm sun on my face, gentle breeze blowing through the trees, and the refreshing sent of outside air. It was one of those feelings that served to remind me of the importance of slowing down and being present in the little moments. During this crazy time of year, I think we could all use a moment to stop and watch the animals!

Five Things I’m Good At…

This is a great daily prompt! I am always fascinated by the responses to questions like these because they can go a variety of ways. The easiest way to answer is always with skills for which you have received recognition. It is also easy to answer with something related to hobbies you enjoy or a hidden talent that you may possess. I mean wouldn’t we all agree that we are amazing singers in the shower and put on the best concerts while in there? The more difficult way to answer this question is with intrinsic things that others may not know about yourself. Perhaps you would also come up with a list that includes extrinsic and intrinsic things. For me, I feel like it is a combination of both!

One thing that I am great at is worrying and letting the things I worry about distract me. In fact, sometimes I think I get some kind of odd pleasure out of having something to worry about. Part of this is a predisposition to worrying. I 100% believe that things like worry and anxiety have a genetic component. Which is why – though it can come across as toxic to some – I try to always find a positive lining to things. It’s for my own good. Sometimes I worry about things so much that after they have come to pass, I find myself simply exhausted. This is the case today. We started the day with having to take a cat to the pet (our cats are family), and I was afraid something was going to be wrong. Why? Probably because I’m still grieving the cat we lost this past summer especially on days when LilKsby brings her up a lot (which he did this morning), but also because the cat didn’t have the best checkup last year. Praise God (yes, I pray over my cats), the cat got a perfect checkup this year! What a relief!

Another thing I am good at is finding joy in the little things. I believe this is truly an amazing skill to have! For example, I am finding joy right now in writing this blog. I also find joy in watching it snow, cuddling up in my chair in front of the twinkling Christmas tree lights, and wandering through art galleries. I think that one of the biggest things that can make a difference in our lives is finding joy in little things.

Guess what else I’m good at? Being creative! I love writing, scrapbooking, painting, sewing, finding ‘reuses’ for items, and singing. I also love to dance even though I have the rhythm of a bucket! There’s something magical about taking something and molding it into something new.

I am good at being social. It can be exhausting because I am an extroverted introvert, but I can do the whole “peopling” thing. It actually recharges my battery to “people” the majority of the time. I love listening to the stories people have to tell and seeing all the wonderful connections that we have. When you get out there and get to “peopling” you learn just what a small world it is!

Finally, I’m good at word puzzles. I absolutely love word puzzles! I love learning the definitions of different words, I love learning the origins of words, and I love utilizing the words that I use from crosswords. It’s fun to be like, “That’s not light brown; that’s ecru.” I also love number puzzles like Sudoku! Puzzles are fun past time, and I like to think they are good for the brain!

What are five things you’re good at?

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

With Infinite Time, I Could…

Daily writing prompt

What could you do more of?

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Everyone has the same number of minutes in a day: 1,440. The way those minutes are spent varies from person to person, but one thing always seems to remain constant. There never seems to be enough time in the day for everything that a person wants to do. However, with infinite time, I could think of a few things I would do more!

Paint – I love painting, but when I sit down to do it, I want at least two solid hours of painting time.
Scrapbooking – I love looking at pictures and making precious pages of our best memories. I also enjoy scrapbook competitions!
Writing – Really working on doing this more. I really want to finish my second non-fiction book soon, and the topic seems very pertinent.
Video Games – Since I was five, I have loved playing video games. I will 100% own up to the being that adult who loves to game.
Puzzles – I love compelting puzzles! Once I start one, I become hooked on completing it. We have stayed up until 3 in the morning completing puzzles before!
Traveling – I love to travel! If time (and money) were infinite, this is where I would be.
Sewing – I love to sew, but again I need bigger time blocks to do it!
Exercise – I would love to spend more time walking, doing yoga, and swimming!
Working – I work what most would consider “side hustles” and more time (and energy) would be great for these!
Studying – I love learning! With more time, I would take a lot more free courses online or watch more instructional videos.
Improve my piano skills and learn guitar!

It’s hard to work all of these into your schedule when you also homeschool and enjoy being involved in community activities! Maybe I should give up sleep, LOL!

What would you like to do more?

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

Sometimes You Lead, Sometimes You Follow

Daily writing prompt

Do you see yourself as a leader?

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By definition, according to the Oxford Dictionary, a leader is “the person who leads or commands a group, organization, or a country.” Solely looking at this definition, I have been a leader. I have been in the President/Highest Office in a few organizations and been one of the supporting main offices (usually secretary) in other organizations. I have also led a team of beauty consultants for almost 15 years. Just going off of what is on paper, I have been a leader in various capacities since about 2004. In other words, if my leadership self was their own person, they’d be having their first legal drink this year! LOL

But do I see myself as a leader?

No. Yes. Maybe. Being a leader is interesting because I do not necessarily see myself as a leader, but I have the type of personality where I can take charge when necessary (especially in critical situations though I may have a come apart when it is over), and I can also be the planner, organizer, etc for various situations. However, sometimes it is also nice to be part of the ensemble so to speak. It’s nice to be in the background while someone else steps in the spotlight. I also feel like as I get older, the reason for seeking leadership changes. When I was younger, sometimes I wanted to be made the leader because it made me feel like I had a bigger purpose (like when I held various offices with organizations). As I have gotten older, I want to lead people with a servant’s heart so that they will be able to mirror that love and gratitude to future generations. Currently, I have a semi-leadership position in a non-profit, and I have said for years that I want to lead it in such away that when I decide to step down, I know that it will be secure for years to come. I have also found myself desiring to grow in business leadership because I know that it will have a bigger positive impact on my own family. However, I also know that to do this and be the best leader I can be, I have some self growth that needs to happen in areas like time management and overcoming obstacles.

So do I see myself as a leader? I see myself growing into the person I was born to be, and if that involves leading others and showing what it is like to live by the Golden Rule, then that’s cool.

Are you a leader?

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

Words of Wisdom From a “Cool Aunt”

At this point in my life, I have had nearly twenty years of experience as an aunt either from being a chosen aunt to my friend’s kids or to those I am actually related because of Mr. Kisby. I’ve always fancied myself a “Cool Aunt” with my fake nose ring (one day it will be real), tendency to draw on myself, hobbies that many consider to be “teenage things,” love of a variety of music from multiple decades including today, and willingness to take the kids to do cool stuff. As someone who had a “Cool Aunt,” I always wanted to be one, so I’ve tried to do my best! However, now that some of my nieces and nephews are becoming young adults, I also want to be the aunt that shares some life advice that isn’t typically learned as part of a diploma pathway in high school or as part of a degree program in college. So here goes…

It is okay to not know what you want to do at 18, 21, 29, 39, or older. Yes, there are some people who know what they want to do from the time they are small, and their dream never changes. However, some of us are still learning even in are 40s. At one time, I wanted to be an actress. I even spent two years of college pursuing that dream before realizing that starving artist really doesn’t sound like a fun career choice to me. Then I wanted to be a business something that required not one but two business degrees. Then I ended up getting a Masters in Teaching. A long the way I also thought it would be cool to be a bar tender, writer, yoga instructor, barista, blogger, and life coach. Of those I only ever pursued writing and blogging, but sometimes I think others would be cool. I kind of just want to have a bar tending licence much like I’ve always wanted a motorcycle license even though I don’t actually want to drive a motorcycle. Guess what I currently do that I never would have dreamed about it my teens or 20s? I want to – and thank the good Lord I get to – be a homeschooling mama who works a few flexible contractor jobs for a little extra moo-lah. The point? It’s 100% okay if what your dream is changes!

There is never a perfect time for anything. If you spend your life waiting for the time to be right, then you are going to either (a) miss out on a lot of cool things while you’re waiting for perfection or (b) never do what you wanted to do. I first heard this lesson from a former co-worker who said “If you wait for the perfect time to have kids, then you’ll never have kids.” I think this sentiment is applicable to a lot of things, and I loved it because we spend so much time hearing “wait for the right time” or “it’s not the right time.” In practice this means try not to say things like “I’ll do X, Y, Z when I finish school” or “I’ll do X, Y, Z when I have a house.” Instead consider if you really want to do the thing in question, or if you know you want the thing, start planning how you can make it happen. Obviously, there are some things that have to wait for some timing. For example, “When I have been at a job for one year and saved money, I will buy a car” and “When I have $5,000, I will be able to rent an apartment, turn on utilities, and buy the basic necessities for a first apartment.” These are logical because one helps get the other. Just keep in mind there is a difference in things taking time and planning and waiting for the perfect moment.

It’s okay if your first big love isn’t your forever romance, and it’s okay if your first big love is your forever romance. Some people are lucky enough to meet the one they are meant to be with at a young age and have it all work out. Some of us don’t meet and date the one we are meant to be with until the second, third, or more relationship. It is okay to be one of these people too. The important part is finding a partner who you have common interests with that you will love just as much in your 70s as you did in your 20s or 30s. I’ve now loved Mr Kisby through three different age decades, and I can tell you with him I hit the jackpot! It took a broken road to get there, but as Rascal Flatts once said, “God blessed the broken road, that led me straight to you.” Along with common interests, it helps abundantly to find someone with similar religious/spiritual beliefs, a similar moral compass, and life goals. It also helps if your partner is someone you like along with loving them. Also, if your grandma doesn’t like your partner, take it has a hint and dump them. Grandmas are smart.

Have fun in life! Yes, being an “adult” is stressful, hard work, and involves a lot of boring things like paying bills, cleaning house, and having to make smart decisions liking eating at home versus going to fast food every night (which could lead to stomach issues so make sure your “adult” job as health insurance). However, you still have to find time to play. If you quit doing things that you find fun, then you’re missing out on a lot of good times. I’m an “adult” with several years of experience, but I still play video games, do stuff outside, chase my kid around, read books, color, paint, go on dates with my hubby, watch TV, sew, and hangout with friends occassionally. Doing those fun things are what keep you sane. Some of my best advice is to do one fun thing a day even if it’s just for five minutes. If you’ve got a lot of shit going on, set a timer on your phone for five minutes and until it goes off do something just for fun even if it’s just jamming out at max volume. Your mental and emotional health will thank you for having fun!

Last but not least, who you are as a person is 100% unique to you. As a kid you are often told what is right and wrong, what you should believe, etc. I can tell you from experience that it is okay if those things change for you as you grow. There are things that I thought were black and white issues. Now I can tell you that a lot of times there are gray areas, but that is because I have made a point of educating myself or have personally experienced the gray areas. You should do the same. Likewise, it is okay to recognize that something that was once commonplace is now offensive and to opt to change your perspective. I can also tell you for me personally, my faith in the Holy Trinity is a lot stronger now because of an almost decade long span where I didn’t attend church, pray, or really think about Jesus. But in the end, I found my way back, and having all those life experiences has made my faith stronger. It’s okay if the same has to happen with you. Likewise, it is okay to have been brought up with no spiritual/religious background and want to learn more about your options. It’s also okay to be steadfast in what you believe and never stray. No matter your story, you will end up where you’re supposed to be as long as you keep moving forward.

I could keep going, but man that’s a lot! And I know from experience that too much advice just goes in one ear and out the year because most of us don’t believe things until we experience them. Plus, a lot of us have the attention span of a goldfish, so some people may not have even read this far. This is a long post for me! Take it or leave it, those are all my words of wisdom as a “cool aunt.”

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

The Truth About Happiness

A couple months ago, someone told me that they think happiness is a scam. However, even after enduring some MEGA unhappiness in May and June, I still don’t think happiness is a scam. I also believe that happiness is more than a mat that sits in a doorway (if you were a teen in the 90s, I hope you get that reference)! However, I will agree that we are taught a lot of false things about happiness. One of the biggest is that happy people are happy all the time. As a generally happy/excitable person, I can assure that this is not true. Happy people also feel a full gamut of other emotions. Trust me, I can be all kinds of angry, sad, jealous, mad, irritated, and anxious too! Another false thing about happiness? A smile equals happiness. Yes, I smile when I’m happy. I also smile when I am nervous, not sure of what to say in a situation, or trying to mask an emotion. Plus, some people just don’t smile. That doesn’t mean they aren’t happy. It just means they have less wrinkles and don’t show their happiness with facial expressions. Finally, I think people confuse happiness and joy. Happiness is very fleeting and tied to specific events. The things that bring me joy are more enduring and fill my cup. That said things that bring me joy can also make me happy, but things that make me happy don’t always bring lots of joy. For example, volunteering brings me joy and usually makes me happy. However, a $1 winning lottery ticket makes me happy for a moment, but it doesn’t bring immense joy.

What do you think is the truth about happiness?

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

9:09…Mission Accomplished

Like my turtle? To most people it is simply a cute turtle made from a cute craft kit. For me, this turtle symbolizes the last of my “missions” aka fun goals while I was 41. Every year, I set out to complete a number of fun things equivalent to my age for the year. Looking back on when I started with “33 While 33” I laugh to myself. In the 8 years of doing this little self fun project, I’ve learned a lot of things (in fact, I probably talked about some of these last May 7). Ready for some life lessons 8 years in the making???

Lesson 1: If you continually set goals that you are never actually willing to work towards, then you probably don’t actually want to achieve those goals, or you have not yet had the right motivation for setting said goals. In my 30s, I frequently put, “I want to lose 20 pounds as one of my goals.” Did it happen? Nope. It was one of those goals that I kept regurgitating on paper because “I thought I should.” There was never an actual purpose attached. Now that I’m older and wiser (HA HA), I realize that losing weight is a great goal, but you have to be willing to make the life changes to do so. It wasn’t until three years ago that I actually began taking steps towards being healthier (giving up soda, working to cut out artificial sweetners, increasing activity). Is the 20 pounds gone? Nope. Do I feel better? Yup! Part of that is the habit changes, and the other part of it is realizing that such a big lifestyle change is a daily process and not an “end goal”.

Lesson 2: If you set a goal on a whim, it is okay to make changes if the goal no longer fits your life’s purpose or current situation. A great example of this is one of my original goals was to do yoga on a beach. Sounds great, right? While I love yoga, and I love the beach, taking a beach vacation was not a family priority for us this year. Thus, I changed the goal to be something more in line with our priorities. By allowing myself to change the goal, I was able to achieve something fun and not feel let down for not accomplishing a fun goal!

Lesson 3: Fun goals for yourself do not have to take a lot of time. Some of my goals for this past year took 15 minutes or less to accomplish. When I do this sort of goal making, it isn’t about things that are difficult or take a long time. These goals are all about making time to do things that I enjoy. Side note, if you didn’t do 41 fun things in the last year, take some to add in some fun. Seriously, one of my goals was doing yoga in the backyard. Anyone, can take time to do yoga in the backyard! Highly recommend doing it during the full moon!

Lesson 4: Your fun goals don’t have to make sense to anyone but you. Mine covered a variety of areas from going to a Broadway show (touring of course!), creating art projects, publishing books, doing some family travel, and hiking. There were other things, but I can’t think of them right now, and my journal is in the other room. The point of this exercise is to let yourself have fun by doing things you enjoy!! No one else will ever enjoy the exact same things you do!

Lesson 5: Write about the fun things you’ve done and take pictures if you’re a visual person! It’s a lot of fun to look back at a journal or a photo album at all the fun things you accomplished in a year!

I feel like I could go and on about this year and my fun goals, but I’d really like to drink the rest of my decaf coffee and finish my bowl of watermelon. My challenge to you is this. Think about some fun goals for yourself and begin working on them before your next birthday! You’ll love the result!!!

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

Face Your Giants

I have always loved to sing. As a child, my parents could locate me out in public because they would hear me singing. I didn’t care who heard me. Moving into teenage and young adult years, I sang a lot of karaoke even one time on stage at Kings Island! But somewhere along the way, I began to believe that I couldn’t sing solo in front of people. I believe it began with auditions for musicals. There was always something terrifying to me about singing a song you barely knew in front of a bunch of other people. Over time the fear became a giant.

Fast forward to becoming a parent. One thing I have noticed is that our children will take on our fears if we aren’t careful. From this I decided that I didn’t want LilKsby to ever feel like he shouldn’t try something fun because it feels a little scary. So I decided that I need to sing a solo and face my giant.

Tonight I did just that! For the first time, I sang two solos as part of our church choir’s Easter Vigil numbers. When I volunteered, I thought the lights would be off when I sang, and that I would only have to go up on stage for one of them. Well, it turned out that the lights were on, and I had to go on stage twice. But guess what? Even with my heart racing, it was great!!! I could picture myself doing it again in the future. 🙂

So how did I face my giant? One, I spent time practicing outside of rehearsals. I practiced with my keyboard and videos. Two, I shared videos of my practicing with those who could provide constructive feedback. Three, I spent a lot of time visualizing how singing in front of everyone would look. Four, I prayed over it…a lot! Was it work? Yes. Was it worth it? YES!

What giant do you need to face?

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

A Little Day Musing

Photo by Andrey Grushnikov on Pexels.com

What’s up? What’s on your mind today? I don’t know about you, but I have had a LOT of things on my mind lately. Can anyone else to relate to 2025 feeling like the longest year ever while time has also been flying by? I realize that seems contradictory, but I’m finding it to be very true. Usually, for me this feeling happens when there are a lot of big events happening, but also not a lot in the daily life outside of our normal routine. I like to call it the “hurry up and wait routine.” This is a routine I dislike (it’s like waiting for the other to shoe to drop except the events your waiting for aren’t always negative) because I feel like sometimes it can cause you to miss out on the little things that are happening. One thing I have started doing this year, is recording the little things that bring joy on a piece of paper and putting them in a big vase. At the end of the year when I get retrospective (because don’t we all start doing that for NYE?), I can look back on all the good things that happened. I’m pretty excited about this, and I get excited when I add things to the jar!

Anyway…that’s not exactly what I intended to write, but I guess I needed to let it out. I intended to share some random musings that have been on my mind lately. In my usual fashion, there’s going to be a list! Grab some popcorn, sit back, and enjoy!

Musing #1 – The number of hex keys you have might be directly related to the number of pieces of IKEA furniture you have assembled. It’s really nice of them to always include the hex key, but my toolbag doesn’t need to be a constant reminder of the amount of money that I’ve spent at IKEA over the years! LOL

Musing #2 – I had a great quote shared with me recently. I don’t where it is from, but it says: “Somebody said, “worrying is like worshipping the problem” and wow.” Can we talk about a mic drop quote? As someone who strives to live faith first, but is also a worrier (usually about things out of my control, and yes I have coping strategies in place) this was a big eye opener. So this week, any time I start to worry, I’ve tried to find positive in the situation.

Musing #3 – Sometimes watching people, pets, etc get old really sucks. However, it is a blessing to realize how lucky you are to have people, pets, etc who love you and you love.

Musing #4 – SNL 50 had some hysterical moments! I never really watched a lot of SNL, but I’m glad I checked out some videos. They brought a lot of laughs! I was team MadTV growing up. I still laugh at those skits too!

Musing #5 – Silence isn’t always complacency; silence can be a means of selfpreservation. This one has been on my mind a lot. Some people like to assume that if you’re silent about hot button topics on social media, then you’re secretly for said topic. However, for some of us not constantly engaging in battle via a keyboard is an important means of keeping our shit together. I’ll take good mental health over arguing with people on the Internet any day!!!

Musing #6 – I hope that people are always able to find joy in something. I know not everyone is going to be like me and get super excited about the littlest things, but I hope everyone in the world has something that brings them joy. If the don’t, then I hope they can find it! In case you’re curious, this morning I was excited by a volcano, and this afternoon I’m excited to spend some quality time with my sewing machine. ❤ The other day I got excited about finding a lampshade on sale! Which reminds me that I need to go find a light bulb since the lamp is for my sewing table.

Musing #7 – It’s okay to have a bad day. I feel like a lot of times we don’t give ourselves permission to have bad days. Even though it has been 14 years since my grandmother passed, January 21 can still be a hard day. However, even the worst days can still have positive outcomes. Yes, I lost my grandma on January 21, and I was deeply saddened and still miss her; however, she was finally out of pain that day and at peace which brings me great joy and relief for her. Likewise, having a miscarriage was extremely sorrowful, but it showed me just how much I wanted to be a mama and that my body was capable of the miracle that is creating life. I really believe that loss made me love our Sweet Boy even more!

Musing #8 – I love snow, and I think it is fun that we’ve had so much this winter. However, we have a lot of events in the next couple of weeks, and I’ve started getting some really cool water park ads. So even though I strongly dislike being hot and sweaty, I’m ready to move forward. Thanks for the snow, Mother Nature. But I’m ready to get outside and start enjoying some sunshine!

Musing #9 – Books are cool! For our schooling, we use A LOT of what are called living books. I love learning right alongside LilKsby, and it is really fun to talk about previous books when we’re reading a new book. I also love that he’s gotten hooked on the sweetest series called Heartwood Hotel (they are not paying me to mention it). Additionally, books teach us, provide entertainment, and allow us to go places we never would be able to see! Books rock!

There are my current musings. What are you musing about today?

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

What the World Needs Now

To say that a lot has happened in the world in the last 48 hours feels like an immense understatement. I’ve seen a variety of posts since yesterday with various messages regarding the events, and I keep feeling like I’ve wanted to post something. However, a single social media post often doesn’t convey exactly what I want it to say. Plus, people tend to take single posts the wrong way or use them as an excuse to start arguments. To me starting arguments is the exact opposite of what the world needs right now. As I watched Mass this evening, there were four things that came to mind the world currently needs.

First and foremost, the world needs forgiveness. When you live in a world without forgiveness, hearts become hardened. Some people need to forgive others – perhaps a neighbor, friend, or family member for a wrongdoing. They may have committed it, the other party may of committed it, and one of the parties may not even know that the wrongdoing occurred. Yet the weight of the act carries hard on the heart, and the only way to move forward is through forgiving the person. Some people also may need to forgive themselves. Often times we are our own harshest critics, and people need to learn to forgive themselves for the mistakes they made. The person you are today is not the person you were five years ago. Forgive those mistakes so that you can pursue your best life and open up your heart to the blessings that you are meant to have in your life!

Forgiveness leads directly into the second thing the world needs: love. As human beings the greatest thing that we can do is love ALL of our fellow human beings. Now let me clarify something important. You can love someone and not like the choices that they make, the beliefs they hold, etc. There is a good chance that they are making the choices that they do because they don’t feel worthy of love due to some circumstance about which you have no knowledge or because they have never been encouraged to think for themselves. The best human beings to walk the earth have always found ways to love one another. These are the humans that have the greatest and longest lasting impact. I will always support people who lead with love over people who promote hate any day!

The other two things the world needs tie heavily into showing love to one another. First and foremost, the world needs people to be a voice for those who cannot have their voice heard. One of the most important things we can do is give a voice to those who society will not listen to be it because of their age, ability level, gender, socioeconomic background, etc. Giving a voice to them shows that you love people and want to see everyone receive care! While giving a voice to those in need, it is also important to remember that the world needs to not oppress people. If you are speaking words, creating rules/regulations/laws, demonstrating actions that actively prevent people from having equal rights and choices, then you are not loving them. You are dictating what they should and should not be allowed to do, and you are passing on judgment on them. In my book, there is only one who should pass judgment, and He’s not walking among us! Do you know what He does do? Encourage loving all people no matter their race, religion, gender, sexuality, background, etc!

This is a heavy message, but it’s been on my heart, so I wanted to share. To lighten the mood, I’ll quote Burt Bacharach, “What the world needs now is love, sweet love. It’s the only thing that there’s just to little of. What the world needs now is love, sweet love. No not just for some, but for everyone.”

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

Another Trip Around the Sun

Photo by Sebastian Arie Voortman on Pexels.com

Tonight concludes another trip around the sun! Usually I blog on my birthday about all the great things that have happened in the last year, but this year I’m feeling a little differently – more introspective – about my birthday. Per usual I did have a list of things that I wanted to accomplish in the year, and as per usual as circumstances changed, the list changed. In the end I accomplished 24 of the 40 on the list, and I had a lot of fun throughout the year. However, more important than the fun was the personal growth that I felt came with 40, so I want to share some of my personal growth tips from the last year.

Learn to set boundaries. If you don’t learn to establish boundaries, people will walk all over you. Also, while learning to set boundaries, understand that it is a process not instantaneous.
Learn to do one thing at a time. As much as we all like to multi-task, we can only be fully present with one thing at a time.
Learn to not let the comments people make bother you to the point that you can’t focus. This is hard, but it is important to learn to do in order to avoid driving yourself crazy.
Try something new or something you haven’t done in a long time. There’s a rush that goes with learning or re-trying a skill!
Put down the phone. Boy this is a hard one that I’m trying to improve upon so that my child doesn’t believe it’s necessary to have a phone in front of your nose. When you put down the phone, you will realize how much stress being on it can cause you.
Schedules are not a bad thing. This is a struggle for me because I like to think I’m fun and do things on the fly, but the truth is that I achieve more and get more joy (because of not rushing) when things are scheduled. Plus, I love having things on the calendar to look forward to doing!
Dance like no one is watching! It’s fun!
Sing your heart out! It’s okay if you’re still belting out all of your favorite 90’s and 00’s songs!
Take one on one time with people. It allows you to connect with them on a deeper level and strengthens relationships.
Coffee, tea, and water are the best drinks on the planet! Water might be the most important, but the other two are right up there!
If you want to see change in the world, start by making a small change yourself. It’s really easy to complain about how hateful everyone in the world is, but by modeling kindness to others, you can be part of the solution.
Read a book or listen to an audiobook! There is power in the written word!
Find faith in something. For me it is God; for you it could be a blueberry muffin. I’m not going to judge what you put your faith into, but I can assure you that it is better to have faith in something than not at all.
Get outside! There is healing in nature!
Plan a trip! Then go on that trip. The world is big, and you deserve to see more than the little slice where you reside.
Purging material items that you don’t need is cathartic especially if you find a way to donate or reuse it instead of filling a landfill.
It’s okay to not believe the same things as previous generations. You’re a different person; therefore, it is okay for your viewpoints to be different.
If you influence children, teach them to actually learn things for themselves instead of believing everything they are told.
Stop believing that everything on the Internet or Social Media is true! If you see something that you’re unsure about its validity, do some research before you repost it.
Be proud of the things you have accomplished! They make you special and wonderful! Having a hard time with this? Take 10 minutes and list some of your greatest accomplishments.
Play with Legos. In fact, if you’re an adult, just find ways to play. Having fun will make your life better!
You’re never too old to look the way you want. Have blue hair! Get a nose ring! Do your thing!!!
Follow your dreams! I had always dreamed of writing and publishing, and now Mr Kisby and I have a little thing called Letters & Lore! It’s connected to this page!
Send handwritten notes to people. It takes more effort than a text or FB post, and it shows that you care.
Learn to stop comparing yourself to others. This is super hard and a work in progress, but I can assure you that if you accept who you are, you can achieve greatness!
Eat Zaxby’s. You can thank me later.
Don’t be afraid to try new things. Change might be scary, but it can also be amazing!
Do something you’ve been afraid to try. For me it was getting back on an airplane, but I had the best time last July, and I feel like I became a better person for it. Plus, it helps teach LilKsby to not be afraid.
Walk, run, jog, whatever…just get moving.
Life is short. Eat cake. Then go back to number 29.
It’s okay to stop doing things you no longer enjoy. Set it aside, and you may find that you like it if you try it again down the road.
Tell people your dreams.
Don’t be afraid to ask for help. Asking for help shows strength not weakness.
Relax during the holidays. Don’t get stressed out by trying to make them perfect. Enjoy them.
Unless you have a legit good reason, don’t say “no” to social invitations.
Make sure your cup is full so that you can pour into others.
Get a massage. It’s okay if you start laughing because you’re ticklish.
Always re-evaluate your goals in life. You’ll get further by allowing yourself to change.
Watch a favorite show again especially if you need a laugh!
Don’t wish time away. You can’t get it back.

That’s a lot of tips! I’ve learned a lot at 40, and I am 100% that 41 is going to be even more exciting and freeing! Much love my friends!

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

10 Things To Try This Spring

Birds are singing, flowers are blooming, and trees are blossoming with new life! We’ve been waiting for it for what feels like forever even though in reality it was a few weeks, and now Spring is finally here! If you’re like me and thinking what to do this Spring, then this Top 10 list is for you! Presenting…10 Things To Try This Spring!

Take a walk around where you live. This may sound basic but Spring is a great time to see what has changed since you were last able to go for walks in the Summer or Fall. The walk will be relaxing because it is in a familiar setting, and you also might get some inspiration for outside your own home!
Look up a trail nearby that you’ve never hiked and hike it! I love to hike on trails in the Spring and Fall. Of course you have to understand that in Summer, I sweat like it is nobody’s business just walking out the door. So the weather in Spring and Fall makes for my perfect hiking climate. I like to hike in the Spring because you get to see all of the life returning to nature. Plus, it’s usually cool up into the day during the Spring which again prevents sweating!
Splash in some mud puddles! If you live somewhere that it rains a decent amount, go outside after it is finished (or when it is raining) and splash through some puddles. You’re going to get wet, but your shoes will dry, and you can change your socks. There’s a childlike joy that comes with splashing in puddles, and we can all use a little childlike joy.
Go for a country drive! I know gas is pricey, but think about it in comparison to buying a bunch of tickets for something. With that perspective the price isn’t so bad! Since I grew up in the middle of nowhere, I’ve always found country drives on winding roads that are surrounded by fields to be relaxing. Plus, there is something so soothing about having the windows down and jamming out to the radio!
Checkout a State Park! I can’t speak for every state, but where I live there is a great state park system. Most of these have a variety of activities, and typically one can be found relatively close to home. We love to walk along the water and hunt for fossils if the water is down, and we also enjoy relaxing in a cabin.
Plant flowers! I love planting flowers! They instantly beautify your surroundings and perk up your mood. Plus, there are great health benefits when you have house plants. I’ve got my little indoor garden in my office, and it frequently perks me up!
Declutter! Spring cleaning is not fun when you think of it in terms of dusting, washing baseboards, shampooing carpets, etc. However, decluttering can be a lot of fun! There is something refreshing and rewarding about getting rid of items you no longer need and passing them on to someone who can use them!
Plan for the future! What better time to rethink your dream vision of your future than Spring when new life is all around you? Make lists of trips you’d like to take, foods you would like to try, movies you want to see, etc. Anything can be on your list, and don’t be afraid to dream big!!!
Reconnect with people! Do you ever find yourself thinking that you wish you talked to someone more? Reach out to them! Send them a “I was thinking about you, I hope you’re doing well.” It doesn’t have to be a big connection, but it will most likely make them feel important.
Try something new for your health. This can be exercising more, getting a long over do checkup, treating yourself to a massage, changing your eating habits, drinking more water, etc. Improving your health is the key to getting to do everything else on your list!

What would be on your list of 10 Things To Try This Spring?

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

Literacy a Fun Idea

I cannot take full credit for this idea. I came up with the idea when I saw this post going around social media about a lady asking her husband and kids to buy her 12 books for Christmas and wrap them with a label for each month. This would be like her own Book of the Month club. Of course I saw this after the holiday, but I thought “I can adapt this!” At first I thought I would just adapt it for myself by rewrapping and labeling books I got for Christmas. Then I got to thinking that this could be a great way to get LilKsby to read different books! He loves to read, but a lot of times we end up reading the same 15 or so over and over. So I went to his bookshelf to find books he hasn’t previously shown an interest in reading and a couple new ones we had set aside. Tonight I wrapped them and put a label on each one. Then I put them all in a shoebox so that it looks a treasure chest. I cannot wait for him to see this box and be excited to unwrap a book each month!

So why am I sharing this here? As I wrapped them, I thought this could be a great way to encourage kids who do not like reading to pick up a book. It could also be a fun way for teachers to introduce a book each month to their class. Participate in summer reading? The same idea could be applied just for summer. This is “literacy” a fun idea for all ages!

Happy reading!

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

Not So Routine

What part of your routine do you always try to skip if you can?

Good news! If you don’t have a consistent routine, you can’t always try and skip something. Bad news! If you don’t have a consistent routine, then you tend to go into surviving not thriving mode. For me the biggest takeaway from this question is the need to establish and follow a routine period.

I have great intentions when it comes to having a routine. However, there’s two obstacles that tend to get in my way. One, if I get invited to do something fun, I have a hard time saying no even if it goes against original plans. Two, when there are only loosely established plans, I tend to throw in as many things as possible. This just leads to chaos. Along with both of these I’m also easily distracted by becoming hyper focused on things that aren’t important.

So, I suppose my answer to today’s daily question is when I establish and follow a routine, I’ll let you know what I skip!

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

The Secret to a Balanced Parent Life

When you become a parent, one of the things that modern society likes to imply is that you can easily balance everything in your life. There is the implication of you can work full time, feel like a stellar parent, have plenty of time for a romantic life, and so on and so forth. Here’s the truth and the secret to my seemingly so well balanced parent life: the idea that you can have it all in equal proportion is pure BS.

Think of it from a mathematical standpoint. If you are trying to balance 4 things equally in a 24 hour period, then you have to be able to devote six hours to each one of those things. Wait! You have necessities that have to be done such as sleeping, eating, and showering. Suppose those take 8 hours per day. That leaves you with 16 hours per day which would allot only 4 hours for each of those things. If you only applied 4 hours a day to your job, your boss would probably get irritated with you pretty quickly especially if they are paying you for 8 hours per day. While this isn’t a perfect example, do you see why you can’t equally balance your priorities?

This is where prioritizing the things that are important to you comes into play. If you’re rolling your eyes because you’re thinking well she’s a work from home mom, so this is easy for her to do, I ask you to take a moment and reflect on what’s preventing you from having an open mind. Having an open mind about your priorities is actually a key to finding balance. For you to find balance as a parent, one of the things you have to think about is what your priorities truly are. Obviously, a main priority is being able to provide financially for ones family. I think most everyone would agree on that. But what are your priorities after that? Do you put keeping a clean house over playing with your child? Do you put making coffee with your SO every night above sitting down and watching TV by yourself while they are in another room? Do you make it a priority to go on dates with your SO even if you’ve been married for a long timed? Once you decide on what the priorities are that will make you feel balanced and complete, then you can move on to implementing your balanced life as a parent.

For me, balance comes from having a Six Most Important things to do list every day. I actually divide my list in order of my priorities which tend to be Faith, Family, Work from Home, and Me Time. If you find that there is little or no fun in your life, then I highly recommend you invest in the Me time. Life is short, so you need to have fun! After looking at those things, I put what the most important thing is that needs to happen for each. Usually Faith has something like prayer, read a religious or spiritual text, and silent reflection. Family has things like School (we homeschool and try to spend at least two hours a day on lessons), Daily Chores (I have specific chores assigned to specific days of the week), and then any other errands that need to be done (call and schedule this appointment, go to the park, etc). The other two totally depend on what I’m doing at the time for those tasks. Sometimes my Work from Home says tutor while other times it is tasks for my DS business. One night a week it is designing journals for Letters & Lore (thegreatkaysby.com/letters-lore). My Me Time has been known to have things like paint, watch a movie, play video games, shave your legs, and paint your nails. Both of those are reflective of what is happening at the time. Does everything get done on my list each day? Nope. Shit happens. Sometimes you don’t find yourself able to get everything done. So how can that still make you feel balanced? Circle it and put it at the top of tomorrow’s list!

The last part of my secret to balanced parent life is to listen to your child(ren). This one is something I’m working to improve as I can feel easily overwhelmed and shutdown when things don’t go exactly as planned. However, your little one won’t remember that they went to bed while there was dirty dishes in the sink. They will remember that you had dinner late because the family took time to play a board game together. Likewise, they won’t remember that you didn’t vacuum this week. They will remember that you took two hours to play outside or spent time decorating the house for a holiday together. Along the same lines, they won’t remember that your car had peanut butter crackers smashed in the floorboard. They will remember the trips to the playground, going on hikes, and driving around to look at the changing leaves. Learning to listen to my child has been one of the best ways to find balance as a parent. By the way, this is also applicable to your SO. Listen to them and their cues both verbal and non-verbal. They need you too!

So there you go. Call it “Tip Tuesday” or just some general life advice, whatever you want to call it. Take the advice or leave it. But know that I didn’t do everything on my to list today because this seemed more important to share. I’ve long been told we teach on what we need to learn, so maybe I needed this more today than completing a list.

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby