inspiration – Page 6 – The Great Kaysby

30 Days…

Today – September 1, 2021 – I showed this video in all of my junior English classes. The students then had to complete a quick write about what they could try for 30 days. As a teacher and business leader, I believe that I should be willing to do the things that I ask my students and team to do. That said, I’m setting a timer for seven minutes, and here is my quick write! Enjoy!

For 30 Days…

I could write every day and have a 50,000 word novel…wait I’ve done that several times! LOL Seriously though, NANOWRIMO is two months away so writers get ready!
I could take a meaningful picture that will always remind me of something good. This is one of my favorite ideas from the video.
I could blog for 30 days straight to grow my virtual presence.
I could record daily Webisodes for my business to help grow my area of influence.
I could do squats every day to help improve my health.
I could make a point of reading at least one positive thing every day.
I could make a point to give at least one sincere compliment every day.
I could take time to read for a minimum of five minutes every day and hopefully finish at least three books this month.
I could work smarter and not harder.
I could create more works of art.
I could drink at least 64 ounces of water each day.
I could visualize my goals coming true.
I could start learning a new language.
I could be sure to eat at least three servings of fruits and vegetables each day (I’m working towards five).
I could listen to an inspirational hotline/podcast.
I could walk at least one mile per day.
I could text a friend to check on them.
I could keep a smile on my face and be positive.
I could support local restaurants as opposed to chains (this would get costly).
I could save $1 a day so that I had $30 (or I could do a bigger amount) extra at the end of the month.
I could start streaming again.
I could get more sleep and not just on the weekends.
I could be more productive in the mornings so that I can relax at night.
I could sing and dance like no one is watching!

Wow! You can get a lot out in a 7 minute quick write! I’m impressed by all of the options that I could do for 30 days! Obviously doing all 24 things from my quick write in one 30 day period isn’t going to work. However, I think that I can focus on a couple. For my physical health, I can do squats every day. For my hobby, I can read at least five minutes every day. Like Matt Cutts talked about in the video, the little thing each day can become a big thing!

Here’s my challenge to you:

Watch the video
Take 7 minutes to brainstorm ideas
Commit to one or two things to do for 30 days
Let me know how it goes

You can do this!

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

Overcoming Obstacles

Earlier today, I made this post on my Facebook page:

At 2:30 today, the weeds were still so high that you couldn’t see the sunflower lights. I’d been putting off weeding it for WEEKS because my mind was full of thoughts like:

*I can’t do this without help.
*If I ask for help, it will seem like I can’t take care of myself.
*I can’t do this, I have a toddler. When would I have time?
*I need to use weed killer because my natural remedies haven’t worked. I can’t use weed killer!
*If I weed the garden and use weed killer, I’ll have to shower afterwards and wash the clothes. Who has time for that?

Today, by 3:20, I had weeded it, gone over it with weed killer, put the clothes in the washer, and showered. It isn’t perfect, but it is much improved! Guess what? I did it by myself during toddler nap time (hubby was in the house while I was outside)! It didn’t take near the time I’d built up in my mind, and it wasn’t as hard as it was in my mind! It’s amazing what the brain can convince us we can’t do when we are perfectly capable of doing it!

While in the garden, I felt like I was in one of my two elements where I feel the most relaxed. When I’m in my relaxing element, I get a lot of deep thinking done. Today’s thoughts? One, our brains telling us something is impossible keeps us from achieving greatness. Two, why is the hardest thing in the world to ask for help?

The first thought came from me realizing how easy weeding the garden was. I’m not exaggerating when I say that I had built it up in my head as an impossible task. As I realized how simple it was, I started thinking about all the other things I’ve told myself are impossible over the years like “you’ll never be able to earn the use of a career car” and “you’ll never be able to lose weight”. How many of these am I actually able to accomplish? What all has my brain been holding me back from achieving? My conclusion? Stop listening to the brain say “you can’t” or “you aren’t”, rip the weed out so to speak, and say job well done everyday progress is made towards a goal! I know that’s easier said than done, but I feel realizing I can do things the brain says I can’t it’s a step in the right direction!

As for my second thought, it’s a doozy! It is super hard for me to ask for help. I feel like society engrains in us that asking for help is a sign of weakness. Like if you have to ask for help, then you’re not good enough to do it on your own or have no business doing it in the first place. Both of these are absurd given at some point in life we all need help to get things done! Last week when my AC needed fixing, I couldn’t have done it without a repairman’s help. No where in my skill set is AC repair! That was easy. Dishes piling up that I don’t have time to do today? I can’t ask for help, I’m supposed to be Super Mom/a Wife! Maybe that right there is the answer! Maybe asking for help is only hard when we feel like something is expected of us! Ooo…that really might be it! Either way, I hope that LilKsby grows up being willing to ask for help! I also hope that he never feels people are judging him for asking for help!

So those are my deep thoughts for the day! What are your deep thoughts today?

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

Advocate & Make a Change!

Parental leave map — Photo from Dominic Hernandez’s FAST FACTS: MATERNITY LEAVE POLICIES ACROSS THE GLOBE

They say you should advocate for what you’re passionate about and attempt to make a change. Since having LilKsby in 2019, I’ve wanted to advocate for better paternity leave in our country. This week, I got a wild hair, and decided to contact my state legislators asking them to do something about improving parental leave. The next day a co-worker sent me a Tweet saying the Louisville Metro Council approved paid parental leave for city employees for twelve weeks following the birth or adoption of a child. Their approval was unanimous! City of Louisville employees are very lucky that the Louisville Metro Council has their back on parental leave. Many people in the United States aren’t so lucky.

Until having LilKsby, I didn’t know much about parental leave. All I knew of it had come from working in the Personnel Department before taking the job I have now. Based on that experience, I assumed that it was the norm to give new mothers six weeks of leave (eight weeks for a C-section) and require the mothers to use either a combination of sick and personal days if they wanted to get paid (and were lucky to have 30-40 to cover the time) or take leave without pay. I had never had reason to look into the policy of other places, so foolishly I made a presumption that this was just how it was everywhere. SHAME ON ME! One should never make presumptions!

My first taste of better parental leave came from Mr Kisby’s job at the time. He was provided with quite the combination of fully and partially paid leave, and he did not have to use any of his vacation time! I was shocked when he told me how good of parental leave his employer provided. His was so good that when you added his time and my time together, LilKsby didn’t have to go to a babysitter until he was three and a half months old!

Since our experience with parental leave, I’ve found myself frequently thinking about the parental leave provided around the world. Did you know that “the United States is the only high-income country, as classified by the World Bank, that does not have paid maternity leave” (Hernandez)? Yes, the United States has employers who provide paid parental leave; however, there is no federally mandated parental leave for births or adoptions. FMLA does cover 12 weeks of unpaid leave for new parents, but the only thing that helps with is securing a position to return to after the time is up. Anyone who has ever had a baby or adopted a child knows that there are A LOT of expenses incurred during parental leave. Unless you’ve been saving for a long time or are willing to rack up debt, going unpaid for 12 weeks is not a viable option for many people.

Here’s another fun thing I learned while on maternity leave with LilKsby that I never knew. Did you know that the recommendations of pediatricians is that babies should not be going out in public until after they’ve had their first vaccinations at 8 weeks old? I didn’t know that! I found it very interesting that pediatricians make this recommendation, yet employers force parents to put their children in daycare at 6 weeks old (or younger) by not paying the new parents beyond that point. Something doesn’t add up with that math!

I can also speak from my own experience that six weeks (or eight weeks in my C-section having case) is not enough for a lot of babies to start breastfeeding consistently and correctly. Our journey was 10 1/2 weeks to achieve accurate breastfeeding. If I hadn’t have been able to fenagle 11 weeks of leave because of summer break and skipping workshops, then we never would’ve achieved the breastfeeding success that I knew would provide the best health for my baby.

I fully realize that not everyone in the world will ever need parental leave. However, I guarantee you that everyone will have a friend or family member that needs to use parental leave at some point. That said, I think it is time that we (everyone who comes across this and all of their family and friends) advocate for better parental leave in this country. America loves to say they are the best at everything, so it is time to make that a reality when it comes to parental leave. I encourage all of my readers to do some research, write to their legislators, and take action to help encourage improvement in the area of parental leave!

I’ll put my soapbox away now. I love you and good night!

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

Hernandez, D., 2018. Fast Facts: Maternity leave policies across the globe – Vital Record. [online] Vital Record. Available at: <https://vitalrecord.tamhsc.edu/fast-facts-maternity-leave-policies-across-globe/> [Accessed 28 March 2021].

The Day History CHANGED

Patriotic free stock photos download (39 Free stock photos) for commercial use. format: HD high resolution jpg images

Last night when people across the country went to bed, a woman had never been Vice President of the United States. Today, just before noon, that changed forever when Vice President Kamala Harris changed history by taking the Vice Presidential Oath of Office. Whether you voted for Biden and Harris or not, you cannot deny the significant historical change of today!

As an elementary aged girl in the late 80s and 90s, I remember hearing the question “Would you rather be the first woman in the NBA or the first woman president?” Understand that this also predates the WBNA being formed. I remember saying first woman in the NBA with hesitation partially because I wanted to give “the cool” answer, but also because the idea that a woman could be president seemed impossible at the time. Truth be told, even though my own state had a female governor from the time I was seven months old until I was four, the idea of women having a major impact on politics seemed impossible at the time. Watching history be changed today, I wish I could go back and tell nine or ten year old me, “Just you wait. Women will have power politically in America!” Guess what? Today, we have that power!

Many years after being that little girl, as I look at the world through “mom eyes”, I am beyond thrilled that LilKsby – who is partially Pacific Islander – will grow up in a world where he sees that all people regardless of race, ethnicity, or gender CAN achieve political offices that once seemed impossible. I am tickled pink that the first Vice President he will remember is a female of color! I am also elated that his peers will grow up in a country where doors have been opened for everyone! Doesn’t that make you feel the empowerment behind the historical changes today?

History aside, I made two other thought changing observations today. Did you know that the Hebrew meaning of the word “Salem” is peace? How ironic that a place where the name of the town meant peace would be synonymous with witch trials! Also, did you notice the number of officials wearing purple at the inauguration today? Think about it…if you take red (Republican) and blue (Democrat) and mix them together, you get purple. What a great symbolic gesture of unity! What if as this change grows the country went from red or blue to all together purple? Peace could be in the works! Peace in our land would be another great change to history!!

Here’s to change!

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

Just Breathe and Take Control

Anyone else feel like if one thing doesn’t go right then they beat themselves up so bad mentally that the rest of the evening is shot? I’m sure I’m not the only one! About 21 hours into 2021, this happened to me for the first time in the New Year. Now it’s 22 hours into 2021, and I can assure you that sometimes you just need to breathe, take control, and everything will work out.

Without going into a lot of details, last night I thought I placed an Amazon order that had to be received before 2020 ended. Tonight, I realized the order never went through. My response was to mentally berate myself so much that I didn’t want to do anything except for sit and be mad at myself. After a few minutes, I logged onto my health account, chatted with a rep (who just happened to be working on New Year’s Day), and realized that I didn’t lose any money. I immediately felt relieved, and I now have a better understanding of how my health account operates. I ended the chat feeling immensely relieved, a little silly for getting so upset, and proud of myself for taking the initiative to attempt to do something about the whole situation which led to a good outcome.

This little story is a great reminder that sometimes we just need to breathe and take control in anyway we can. It is also a reminder that this is something I need to continuously work on improving. I’d been attempting to think all day about things I need to work on during 2021, and I kept making excuses for why I couldn’t think about it at a given time. As it turns out, I didn’t need think time; I just needed a bump in the road to remind me of what I need to improve in 2021. I just need to remember to breathe and take control when things seems to not go as expected!

Here’s to just breathing and taking control! Happy 2021!

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

Wellness Wednesday

Happy Wellness Wednesday! For our family on this particular Wednesday, wellness has meant family flu shots. Yup, flu shots all around! However, wellness doesn’t just have to mean something associated with a vaccine or physical ailment. Wellness can be associated with mental and emotional health just as much as physical. In fact, I personally believe that mental and emotional health is more important than the physical health! Anybody agree?

No matter what Wellness Wednesday means to you, I thought you might enjoy my favorite wellness tips.

Stay hydrated! Drink plenty of water! Why? One, dehydration blows. Seriously, some of the worst I’ve ever felt was when dehydrated. Two, water is great for your skin. Three, it’s been proven than drinking water actually helps you stay awake more than caffeine (ties in with hydration and no crash factor). Plus, water can be super tasty! I’m sure I’m not the only person who loves to infuse their water with flavors!

Get outside! I’ve always said that Seasonal Affective Disorder was a thing even before it had that title. Getting out in the sun and being part of nature can improve any mood. There’s something invigorating about going for a walk on a crisp day! There’s also something about nature (for me especially around bodies of water) that can provide you with so much clarity about life.

Nap Like a Toddler! Lilksby is in that stage where somedays he needs a 30 minute nap, and other days he needs a 2 hour nap. It’s all relative to how much sleep he’s had and the activities of the day. However, no matter the amount of time the nap is, he wakes up refreshed and ready to go for the rest of the day. We all could use those little boosts. So nap like a toddler!

Self Care Isn’t Selfish! How many of you feel guilty when you take time for you? I know this can be an easy trap to find yourself in, but I firmly believe that self care makes you better for all those you’re around. If you aren’t feeling your best, then you won’t be your best self for them. Self care doesn’t have to be complicated. It can be as simple as taking a bubble bath, doing a face mask, exercising by yourself, or sitting with a book and a glass of wine. I recommend self care at least a couple times a week. If you’re a planner, then plan for Self Care Sunday and Wellness Wednesday.

Read or Write! I tell people all the time that it doesn’t matter what you read or write, but there’s something about those activities that can make you feel more alive. I think it is because when you’re reading or writing, you’re actively engaging more of your brain than if you’re just staring at a screen watching mindless videos. (Don’t get me wrong, mindless videos have their place especially when I’m sick. I just don’t think they promote better wellness.) I know that for me, reading promotes wellness because it is so engaging and to a degree has me thinking instead of just responding especially if I’m reading a mystery or piece that promotes rhetorical thinking. I also believe that writing is one of the things that keeps me the most sane whether it is for this blog, a brain dump, gratitude journal, or friendly note to someone. For me reading and writing wellness keep my brain from becoming mush! Figuratively of course!

Those are my thoughts on promoting wellness. What are your Wellness Wednesday thoughts?

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

Optimism + Information = Hope

Photo Credit: http://www.goodreads.com
https://images.app.goo.gl/2gUxuLcmeZqiDKpd7

“Optimism + information = hope” is a saying from the late Christopher Reeve used by Michael J. Fox in his book Always Looking Up The Adventures of an Incurable Optimist. I was too young/not interested in the genre to know Christopher Reeve as Superman. To me he was always the celebrity injured in a horrific accident who used his accident to advocate for himself and others. However, I loved Michael J. Fox from a young age. I absolutely loved him as Alex P Keaton and Teen Wolf in the 80s. I remember going to see Back to the Future III in the theater even though I was only 7 when it came out. When he returned to the small screen on Spin City, I was beyond thrilled. That thrill turned to shock upon learning that he had been diagnosed with Parkinson’s Disease. In 1998, when he announced his diagnosis, it was something that I in my sheltered existence had not heard a lot about, but luckily I like to learn.

Today (ironically on Mike’s 59th birthday), I finished reading his second book. I’d previously read Lucky Man and A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Future, but I decided to check out Always Looking Up as part of the adult summer reading challenge (read a non-fiction book). This book was amazingly informative! Did you know that bradykinesia and dyskinesia are both things that PD patients experience? Did you know that PD patients can’t just lay down and go to sleep at night? Did you know that simple things like sitting at a table in a restaurant or in a seat in an auditorium can be difficult for PD patients? I didn’t! Why? Simply stated, I didn’t know these things because I had never thought of them. Always Looking Up made me think about these things which is empowering as I’ve long felt that the reason people don’t understand cultural, political, social, etc issues is because they don’t have the needed information.

This book was informative on several levels. The first section called “Work” talks about how the Michael J. Fox Foundation came to exist. In the second section “Politics” he discusses some of the advocating that he did for Stem Cell Research. Following are sections devoted to “Faith” and “Family” and the ways they’ve impacted his life both before and with PD. It was fascinating to learn more about all of these things and learn more about Michael J. Fox himself. To say his story is an inspiration would be an understatement!

I’m glad that I took the time to read this book. I really believe that we can learn a lot from reading as in some cases it will be as close as we can get to walking in someone else shoes. Perhaps if we all read up on things, then we would all be better for it, and the world would become a better place. But perhaps that is just “optimism + information = hope” to once again quote Christopher Reeve.

For more on these men checkout: https://www.christopherreeve.org/ and https://www.michaeljfox.org/. Also, happy birthday, Michael J. Fox!

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

Gnome Story

I love to paint, but I’m not a skilled artist. I’ve been to just enough paint and sip parties to call myself a dabbler. I’ve bought canvases, paints, and tools so that I can paint (and sip) at home. Back in February, I decided to host a paint night, and I was determined that I was going to paint a gnome. I knew I couldn’t do it without looking some ideas up online, but I was determined!

Determination led to looking at a lot of pictures of gnome paintings on Google Images. I eventually found a picture of the one above while searching “Gnome Sweet Gnome”, and I decided that this was the gnome I was going to paint. Step one was figuring out how I was going to get the gnome from the picture on my phone to the canvas. In the past, I had printed out the object I planned to paint and traced it onto the canvas. This time that didn’t seem like the best course of action. This led to deciding that I was going to have to attempt drawing it by hand (also not a big skill of mine). Long story short, I drew the gnome by hand, and painted it all myself! The end result was the gnome in the picture above.

So what is the point of my little gnome story?

The first point to my gnome story is that you never know what you can achieve if you don’t try. It would’ve been really easy to have talked myself out of attempting to draw and paint my gnome based on my previous perceptions about my artistic ability. This time I didn’t talk myself out of trying, and I am still amazed two months later at the gnome that I created myself!

The second point to my gnome story is that great joy can be found in the simplest things. When I look at my gnome painting, I can’t help but smile. I think it is important for all of us to having something that we can look at and smile every time we look at it. This thing could be a picture of a vacation, a ticket stub from a movie, a favorite book cover, etc. What the object is doesn’t matter; what matters is the feeling of joy that it provides.

Those are the points of my gnome story. What’s your gnome story?

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

Hope

“…it was an extraordinary gift for hope, a romantic readiness such as I have never found in any other person…” F Scott Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby

Since the beginning of self-isolation and social distancing to prevent the spread of COVID-19, I’ve been wanting to write; however, I’ve not been sure of what to write. Then, Friday it was nice out, and we went for a family walk. Before we came back in the house, I checked the rear of the house for storm damage from the previous night. That’s when I passed my flowerbed and saw the tiny bloom on my phlox. In that moment, I knew what to write about: hope.

As we are in the midst of a global pandemic, the media is full of gloom and doom. Yet if you look for it, there are signs of hope in the media. Here are some that I think need to be shared:

Two of the elderly at the nursing home in Washington where so many have died fully recovered.
Two of the people diagnosed in Kentucky have fully recovered (perhaps more by now)
People are doing the kindest things for the elderly in assisted living and nursing homes like putting up bird feeders outside their windows
People are finding alternate ways to visit while maintaining social distance
Andy Beshear is leading our state by showing how much he cares for the people
China (as of yesterday) has had no new mainland cases for 3 days
Last week, our local school district delivered 26,911 meals to school age children and elderly/at risk communities members
Government is coming together to help those facing unemployment, loss of health care, etc.
Groups of people are coming together to raise funds and deliver meals to those in need.

All of these example have helped me to have hope during this pandemic. I not only have hope for health, I also have hope that we will come out of this stronger. I have hope that we will come out of this as better people who are generally more caring. I have hope that our planet will come out in better shape because people are using less resources. I have hope that everyone else can see the silver lining in this cloud!

I’d love to know how you are seeing hope! Share in the comments!

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

Hope

“…it was an extraordinary gift for hope, a romantic readiness such as I have never found in any other person…” F Scott Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby

As we are in the midst of a global pandemic, the media is full of gloom and doom. Yet if you look for it, there are signs of hope in the media. Here are some that I think need to be shared:

Two of the elderly at the nursing home in Washington where so many have died fully recovered.
Two of the people diagnosed in Kentucky have fully recovered (perhaps more by now)
People are doing the kindest things for the elderly in assisted living and nursing homes like putting up bird feeders outside their windows
People are finding alternate ways to visit while maintaining social distance
Andy Beshear is leading our state by showing how much he cares for the people
China (as of yesterday) has had no new mainland cases for 3 days
Last week, our local school district delivered 26,911 meals to school age children and elderly/at risk communities members
Government is coming together to help those facing unemployment, loss of health care, etc.
Groups of people are coming together to raise funds and deliver meals to those in need.

I’d love to know how you are seeing hope! Share in the comments!

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

Following or Living?

I’m not perfect.

I make mistakes.

However, I truly believe Jeremiah 1:5 – “Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you. Before you were born, I set you apart.”

That said, I will be the first to say that though I’ve been Catholic for most of my life (there was a hiatus in my 20’s), I don’t always remember what the preacher is saying at Mass. Thus, I am truly shocked that today – Monday – I am still pondering yesterday’s sermon on the Heart of the Nation Mass (don’t judge me for watching Mass on YouTube…at least I’m watching!). The priest was talking about the Pharisees and how they were determined to follow the law. He then went on to discuss how Jesus didn’t just want people to follow the law; Jesus wanted people to live the law.

Specifically he mentioned the law of “Thou shalt not kill.” You can follow this law by not murdering. Simple enough. Living the law of “Thou shalt not kill”? Not as simple. If you think about it, every time we have a negative self deprecating thought, we are killing our spirit. Likewise, every time we say something negative about someone, we are killing their self-esteem. It is so easy to make comments such as “She’s gaining weight!” or “He looks like he’s on drugs!” We (society in general) have a tendency to think that if no one hears our negative comments, then it won’t impact them.

WRONG!

Eventually, the person who is having negative comments made about them is going to find out the comments are being made, and there is a very good chance that it is going to make them feel terrible! Their self-esteem might be damaged; their spirit might be killed. If I’m following the law, I didn’t break “Thou shalt not kill.” But if I’m living it? I sure did break it!

The more I thought about this scenario, I began to realize that the idea of “following or living” isn’t just applicable to laws. The idea is applicable to everyday life. My day job – the one that puts food on the table and keeps the shelter over our heads – is teaching. Every school day, I see kids who are following the actions and words of their peers because they want to feel like they have a place. Instead of living their own lives, they get caught up with what is deemed “cool” or “acceptable”. Sometimes they even lose sight of who they are in the process.

I see this with adults too – including myself at times – who want to follow all of what they are told without question. I do this A LOT with what LilKsby’s pediatrician tells us to do to the point that it drives other people bananas! In my life, I’ve never felt like I’m purposely “following” instead of “living”, but as creatures of habit it can be easy to get caught up in just “following”. It’s not intentional. It’s just easy.

That said, a lot of my goals for 2020 are very tied to “living” and not “following”. This year, I want to be more creative. I want to get in better shape. I want to blog more. I want to read a lot of books with LilKsby. I want to spend more time with MrKsby. I want to have purple hair and get my nose pierced even if people think it is weird for someone in their 30’s to want. I want to become the person I am destined to be spiritually, emotionally, and physically. In short? I want “LIVING” and not “FOLLOWING”!

Will it be hard? Yup!

Will it have obstacles? Yup!

Will it be worth it? HELL YES!

By the way…it will also involve music because there is a little girl in me who dreamed of singing, and she’s ready to be free! Luckily, I can carry a tune!

I know this blog has been a little all over the place (let’s face it, that’s how my brain works), but I hope that it inspires you! I hope that in 2020 and every other year that you will choose “living” over “following” and be who you were put on this earth to be! I believe that if we all choose “living” over “following”, then great things can happen!

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

https://giphy.com/gifs/buffy-the-vampire-slayer-summers-gift-xdfFRQ3dfr4YM