inspiration – Page 5 – The Great Kaysby

Thanksgiving Night Thinking

Photo by Karolina Grabowska on Pexels.com

The day’s festivities have come to a close, and I find myself in that weird post holiday celebration mode of “What am I supposed to be doing?” You don’t want to just go to bed because it is still super early, but at the same time you don’t want to do anything mentally taxing because it has been a relaxing day. Anyone else in this mode?

Before the pandemic, I would have been trying to go to bed by 10, so that getting up at 4 to go shopping still meant getting 6 hours of asleep! I never would be in bed that early because I’d be too busy picking out the best deals and strategizing what to get. This year even though we occasionally take LilKsby out to non-crowded places, we’re still not taking him out like pre-pandemic because toddlers can’t get vaccinated, and he only keeps his mask on for like three minutes. That said, it really surprised me how much I miss this part of Thanksgiving night! I’ve been lamenting it so much that this evening that Mr Kisby even asked me if I want to go shopping tomorrow. I told him no because I don’t really want to go in stores; I just like the idea of it.

Truth be told, I hadn’t even thought about actually going shopping until this week. The catalyst for change? I went to a funeral visitation for one of my professional mentors. They weren’t very old, and they were a big reason I am where I am today professionally. Their passing has been a reminder of just how precious life is, and how important it is to spend your time doing the things you enjoy with those you love. Even though what you enjoy may seem trivial to others, take time to do it!

I know that I am not the only person coping with loss this week. My hope is that as all of those who are healing from loss find comfort and know that while their hearts will always ache, it will become easier. (I know first hand that holidays after loss can be hard, but they do get easier with time.) I hope that everyone will find a way to do something that brings them joy if not today or tomorrow then one day soon. If this means going shopping, then I hope you shop! If this means singing in the shower so loudly that your throat hurts, I hope you sing your heart out! If this means walking alone in the woods to clear your mind, I hope you walk!

I know that this is some deep thinking for a day usually spent pondering family, food, naps, and TV, but sometimes we just have to get our thoughts out! What things are you thinking about on Thanksgiving night?

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

Unplug to Recharge

I’m by far not a Transcendentalist. I tend to function better when I have a set routine, and even though I have a unique sense of style there is nothing groundbreaking about how I dress. I’m also too concerned with covering the amount of gray in my hair to say that I march to the beat of my own drummer. Even the unpopular things I’ve been involved with throughout my life such as theatre, medieval reenactment, playing video games, playing tabletop games, and writing have somehow become mainstream. However, there is one part of transcendentalism that I totally get: nature.

For me nature is where I go to unplug and recharge. (Unplug is kind of a loose term, but I’ll explain that in a minute.) There is something about being out in nature whether it is hiking, swimming, or sitting in a cabin looking out at the trees that helps me to feel peaceful and relaxed. This weekend was spent sitting in a cabin in the woods surrounded by family, and I can say that I haven’t felt this relaxed going into a work week since last May when a weekend was spent in a cabin in the woods! It was wonderful to unplug from all of the responsibilities of home! I don’t know about everyone else, but I struggle to truly relax at home. Even when I’m reading, writing, sewing, etc there is always that voice in the back of my head saying “You should be doing x, y, and z!” With that mantra in my head, it’s impossible to be totally serene at home. However, in a cabin, I can unplug that little voice and relax!

Relax and unplug for me is probably different than a lot of people. I still played on my phone while unplugging, and I still used my laptop. The difference is that instead of working, I used my devices to research things I would like for Christmas, order Christmas pajamas, and look at gifts for LilKsby. Not a bit of work was done! I also finished one book, read another book, and started a third one (all Stephanie Plum novels)! My only to do tasks all weekend were eat, hangout with family, and sleep! It was also relaxing to be able to go on a trip without having to go on the interstate. Back roads are way more relaxing! The best part of the weekend? The relaxation has continued even at home tonight. I’m not even stressed about going to work tomorrow!

I’m so thankful that I was able to spend the weekend in nature, unplug from everyday life, and recharge! Are you recharged for the week?

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

Dental Dwelling

This afternoon Mr Kisby and I had dentist appointments. While he was in his appointment, I started thinking about how different going to the dentist is as a kid. As a kid going to the dentist (or ortho) can be exciting! Not because you’re going to the dentist, but because it means getting out of school early. This leads to getting to play video games sooner (I would’ve picked a Zelda game), having a snack sooner, etc. Even though the dentist part wasn’t fun, it was always fun to get home early!

As an adult going to the dentist is exciting in a different way. For many of us, going to a dentist or doctors appointment requires taking off work either a full or half day. In a perfect world, the portion of the half day not spent at the dentist would be just as fun filled as it was during childhood. However, the world isn’t perfect and frequently any spare time is somehow spent adulting! This was very true for me today! During the time Mr Kisby was in the dentist and I was waiting for my appointment, I managed to drop items off at our local charitable thrift store, purchase air filters for our HVAC system from a local business, drop off recycling, and call two businesses with whom we work! When I was coming out of the local business, it hit me how different going to the dentist is as an adult. Never as a kid would I have imagined that I’d be so excited to get so many errands accomplished in 45 minutes! For that matter as a kid I never knew I’d one day be purchasing air filters! Spoiler, I would’ve been excited as a kid to have a few minutes to read in the parking lot before my appointment like I did today!

Going to the dentist isn’t the only thing that is different from childhood to adulthood. Most things are completely different than when we were too little to worry about money, be concerned with time, and have anxiety over things that are out of our control. I’d say those were the good old days, but I also love hanging out with Mr Kisby and LilKsby too much to believe that! However, at the end of the day, I think it’s important to remember what it was like to be a kid, and sometimes I think we need to embrace it! For me, this currently means I need to check on my Sims!

What do you dwell on when you go to the dentist?

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

Challenge Complete

Can you believe it has been 30 days since I made my 30 day challenge post? Did you try anything new for 30 days this month? Guess what?? I did! Every day in September, I did squats. It started with 50 per day, then just this week it became 100 per day!

Now, I don’t say that to brag. It was a tough journey! Here are some things I’ve learned from my squats:

1. Accountability partners are key!

2. Sometimes you have to push yourself to do things you don’t want to do.

3. Going from 0 to 100 – even over time – is painful, but it’s good pain.

4. Squats get my heart rate up more than walking.

5. Squats work your core. I’ve now got some definition in my core that’s never been there before.

6. Physical health involves physical ability and having an “I can” mindset.

7. Doing one thing for 30 days makes you want to try more things for 30 days!

I hope that you completed a 30 day challenge in September. However, if you didn’t, I’ve got great news for you! Tomorrow is a brand new month, and a brand new opportunity to take a challenge!

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

How Are You Really?

How many times a day are you asked “How are you?” or a similar question? How often is your response “I’m fine”, “Good”, or something similar? Do you feel like these responses border on robotic because you know the person talking to you doesn’t want to hear the truth?

I bet if I could see you, then I would have just seen a raised hand!

Now let me ask you this question, “How are you really?” Instead of responding with the first thing that pops in your mind, I encourage you to take a few moments and do a wellness check. So take a deep breath and join me on a reflective journey for the next five minutes! Ready? Let’s go!

Minute 1 – Get comfortable by taking a seated position that makes you relaxed, lounging on your most comfortable piece of furniture, or try utilizing shavasana (corpse pose). Take a few deep breaths and clear your mind.

Minute 2 – Think about your physical health. Quickly do a head to toe body scan and note anything out of the ordinary. Perhaps you will notice that your eyes feel tired and strained from increased screen time. Maybe you will notice that your shoulders and hips feel out of alignment due to poor posture or a previously diagnosed condition like scoliosis. You may notice that your muscles are stiff from new exercises that you’ve been doing. If something seems alarming, make a note and call a health professional so that you don’t fret over the issue.

Minute 3 – Think about your emotional health. What emotions have you felt today? Were you frustrated because you had to do things at work today that you don’t enjoy? Did you find a reason to laugh or smile today? Did you feel sad? Did you feel content? If you’re emotions have been like a roller coaster, take a moment to consider what caused such fluctuations. Also, never hesitate to call a professional if need be.

Minute 4 – Think about your mental health. Have you experienced anxiety today? Have you felt stressed today? Is your mental health beginning to impact you physically and emotionally? If you examine your mental health and realize that you need professional help, then reach out to someone. There is no shame in getting the mental health assistance you need. I don’t talk about it a lot, but I’ve had to take medication for anxiety in the past. At first I thought people would judge me for having to be on it, but now I’m not afraid to acknowledge that it was necessary. I hope that my own admission will help others be comfortable with getting the help they need!

Minute 5 – What are your next best steps? Now that you’ve evaluated your health, it is time to consider the next best steps. Personally, my next best physical step is to continue increasing my exercise levels. For my emotional health, it is remembering to not let one mishap mess up my emotions/mood for the whole day. This has always been hard for me! As far as mental health, my next best step is working on coping strategies for stress. Please know that your next best steps may be different than mine; in fact, your next best steps should be different and unique to your health.

Now that you’ve had a moment to evaluate yourself, “How are you really?”

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

A Secret to Happiness 😊

Do you want to know the secret to happiness? With the caveat that I’m exhausted from last night’s insomnia (see the previous blog), I will tell you a secret to happiness. Are you ready? Here goes…

The secret to happiness is to realize it is okay for the things that bring you happiness to change.

As I write this, I’m lying on bed with LilKsby while he plays educational games on Mr Kisby’s phone. Normally, it doesn’t bring me happiness for him to play on phones because I believe there is a link between screen time and attention span length (I’m a mama not a scientist, so I could be wrong). However, on a day like today when I could go to bed before bath time, it brings me great happiness to just relax with him next to me. On a normal day this might make me feel reminiscent of a sloth, but not today!

This example of day to day happiness variance is not typical; however, it is reminiscent of how what brings us happiness changes throughout life. If you think back on your lifetime, I bet there are things you can think of that used to bring you happiness that no longer do or you’ve simply out grown. For example, Barbies brought me happiness from like 5 to 12. Do I wish Barbies still made me happy? Nope, but I’m glad I enjoyed them and the creativity they fostered while I did!

From about 19 to 29, a game called Amtgard brought me a lot of happiness (along with some headaches literally and figuratively). It’s been almost a decade since I’ve been active with it because it became more of a habit than an activity of happiness. However, I’m EXTREMELY thankful for the time that it brought me happiness and the skill is learned while playing. (Side note, it was stress relieving to get to legally hit people with foam sticks!) Today, I am ABUNDANTLY blessed by the husband and friendships that came from it. Guess what? They still make me happy!

Likewise some of the things I never knew would bring me happiness when I was younger have brought me more joy than I ever could’ve imagined. I am an only child, and I was never around babies much growing up. From this experience, I was sure that I never wanted kids. That is until I met my husband, and I got to see how cool kids were with our niece and nephews. This led to me finding out at 36 that being LilKsby’s mama brings me more happiness than I ever knew possible!

And there you have it. The secret to happiness is realizing that it is okay for the things that bring you happiness to change. So if you find yourself not enjoying something like you used to enjoy it, I challenge you to try something new. Read, paint, start a blog, plan a vacation, start a side hustle…invest in yourself and make time for happiness! Most of all, if you agree with me, pass the secret to happiness on to someone!

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

Feel Good Friday

What if every Friday you did one good deed for someone else? It could be buying them their favorite drink; it could be writing them a quick thank you note; it could be sending them a message saying “you’re doing a great job”. Whatever you did for someone would not have to have a financial cost, but it has the potential to have a reward greater than money: happiness. The more happiness that someone has in their life, the more happiness they can put into the lives of others. Imagine a world where people experienced more happiness! I bet it would be a more peaceful world!

Today I challenge you to do something that makes someone else feel good. You might inspire them to do something good for someone else. There’s no telling how big the ripple effect could become!

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

30 Days…

Today – September 1, 2021 – I showed this video in all of my junior English classes. The students then had to complete a quick write about what they could try for 30 days. As a teacher and business leader, I believe that I should be willing to do the things that I ask my students and team to do. That said, I’m setting a timer for seven minutes, and here is my quick write! Enjoy!

For 30 Days…

I could write every day and have a 50,000 word novel…wait I’ve done that several times! LOL Seriously though, NANOWRIMO is two months away so writers get ready!
I could take a meaningful picture that will always remind me of something good. This is one of my favorite ideas from the video.
I could blog for 30 days straight to grow my virtual presence.
I could record daily Webisodes for my business to help grow my area of influence.
I could do squats every day to help improve my health.
I could make a point of reading at least one positive thing every day.
I could make a point to give at least one sincere compliment every day.
I could take time to read for a minimum of five minutes every day and hopefully finish at least three books this month.
I could work smarter and not harder.
I could create more works of art.
I could drink at least 64 ounces of water each day.
I could visualize my goals coming true.
I could start learning a new language.
I could be sure to eat at least three servings of fruits and vegetables each day (I’m working towards five).
I could listen to an inspirational hotline/podcast.
I could walk at least one mile per day.
I could text a friend to check on them.
I could keep a smile on my face and be positive.
I could support local restaurants as opposed to chains (this would get costly).
I could save $1 a day so that I had $30 (or I could do a bigger amount) extra at the end of the month.
I could start streaming again.
I could get more sleep and not just on the weekends.
I could be more productive in the mornings so that I can relax at night.
I could sing and dance like no one is watching!

Wow! You can get a lot out in a 7 minute quick write! I’m impressed by all of the options that I could do for 30 days! Obviously doing all 24 things from my quick write in one 30 day period isn’t going to work. However, I think that I can focus on a couple. For my physical health, I can do squats every day. For my hobby, I can read at least five minutes every day. Like Matt Cutts talked about in the video, the little thing each day can become a big thing!

Here’s my challenge to you:

Watch the video
Take 7 minutes to brainstorm ideas
Commit to one or two things to do for 30 days
Let me know how it goes

You can do this!

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

Overcoming Obstacles

Earlier today, I made this post on my Facebook page:

At 2:30 today, the weeds were still so high that you couldn’t see the sunflower lights. I’d been putting off weeding it for WEEKS because my mind was full of thoughts like:

*I can’t do this without help.
*If I ask for help, it will seem like I can’t take care of myself.
*I can’t do this, I have a toddler. When would I have time?
*I need to use weed killer because my natural remedies haven’t worked. I can’t use weed killer!
*If I weed the garden and use weed killer, I’ll have to shower afterwards and wash the clothes. Who has time for that?

Today, by 3:20, I had weeded it, gone over it with weed killer, put the clothes in the washer, and showered. It isn’t perfect, but it is much improved! Guess what? I did it by myself during toddler nap time (hubby was in the house while I was outside)! It didn’t take near the time I’d built up in my mind, and it wasn’t as hard as it was in my mind! It’s amazing what the brain can convince us we can’t do when we are perfectly capable of doing it!

While in the garden, I felt like I was in one of my two elements where I feel the most relaxed. When I’m in my relaxing element, I get a lot of deep thinking done. Today’s thoughts? One, our brains telling us something is impossible keeps us from achieving greatness. Two, why is the hardest thing in the world to ask for help?

The first thought came from me realizing how easy weeding the garden was. I’m not exaggerating when I say that I had built it up in my head as an impossible task. As I realized how simple it was, I started thinking about all the other things I’ve told myself are impossible over the years like “you’ll never be able to earn the use of a career car” and “you’ll never be able to lose weight”. How many of these am I actually able to accomplish? What all has my brain been holding me back from achieving? My conclusion? Stop listening to the brain say “you can’t” or “you aren’t”, rip the weed out so to speak, and say job well done everyday progress is made towards a goal! I know that’s easier said than done, but I feel realizing I can do things the brain says I can’t it’s a step in the right direction!

As for my second thought, it’s a doozy! It is super hard for me to ask for help. I feel like society engrains in us that asking for help is a sign of weakness. Like if you have to ask for help, then you’re not good enough to do it on your own or have no business doing it in the first place. Both of these are absurd given at some point in life we all need help to get things done! Last week when my AC needed fixing, I couldn’t have done it without a repairman’s help. No where in my skill set is AC repair! That was easy. Dishes piling up that I don’t have time to do today? I can’t ask for help, I’m supposed to be Super Mom/a Wife! Maybe that right there is the answer! Maybe asking for help is only hard when we feel like something is expected of us! Ooo…that really might be it! Either way, I hope that LilKsby grows up being willing to ask for help! I also hope that he never feels people are judging him for asking for help!

So those are my deep thoughts for the day! What are your deep thoughts today?

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

Just Breathe and Take Control

Anyone else feel like if one thing doesn’t go right then they beat themselves up so bad mentally that the rest of the evening is shot? I’m sure I’m not the only one! About 21 hours into 2021, this happened to me for the first time in the New Year. Now it’s 22 hours into 2021, and I can assure you that sometimes you just need to breathe, take control, and everything will work out.

Without going into a lot of details, last night I thought I placed an Amazon order that had to be received before 2020 ended. Tonight, I realized the order never went through. My response was to mentally berate myself so much that I didn’t want to do anything except for sit and be mad at myself. After a few minutes, I logged onto my health account, chatted with a rep (who just happened to be working on New Year’s Day), and realized that I didn’t lose any money. I immediately felt relieved, and I now have a better understanding of how my health account operates. I ended the chat feeling immensely relieved, a little silly for getting so upset, and proud of myself for taking the initiative to attempt to do something about the whole situation which led to a good outcome.

This little story is a great reminder that sometimes we just need to breathe and take control in anyway we can. It is also a reminder that this is something I need to continuously work on improving. I’d been attempting to think all day about things I need to work on during 2021, and I kept making excuses for why I couldn’t think about it at a given time. As it turns out, I didn’t need think time; I just needed a bump in the road to remind me of what I need to improve in 2021. I just need to remember to breathe and take control when things seems to not go as expected!

Here’s to just breathing and taking control! Happy 2021!

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

Optimism + Information = Hope

Photo Credit: http://www.goodreads.com
https://images.app.goo.gl/2gUxuLcmeZqiDKpd7

“Optimism + information = hope” is a saying from the late Christopher Reeve used by Michael J. Fox in his book Always Looking Up The Adventures of an Incurable Optimist. I was too young/not interested in the genre to know Christopher Reeve as Superman. To me he was always the celebrity injured in a horrific accident who used his accident to advocate for himself and others. However, I loved Michael J. Fox from a young age. I absolutely loved him as Alex P Keaton and Teen Wolf in the 80s. I remember going to see Back to the Future III in the theater even though I was only 7 when it came out. When he returned to the small screen on Spin City, I was beyond thrilled. That thrill turned to shock upon learning that he had been diagnosed with Parkinson’s Disease. In 1998, when he announced his diagnosis, it was something that I in my sheltered existence had not heard a lot about, but luckily I like to learn.

Today (ironically on Mike’s 59th birthday), I finished reading his second book. I’d previously read Lucky Man and A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Future, but I decided to check out Always Looking Up as part of the adult summer reading challenge (read a non-fiction book). This book was amazingly informative! Did you know that bradykinesia and dyskinesia are both things that PD patients experience? Did you know that PD patients can’t just lay down and go to sleep at night? Did you know that simple things like sitting at a table in a restaurant or in a seat in an auditorium can be difficult for PD patients? I didn’t! Why? Simply stated, I didn’t know these things because I had never thought of them. Always Looking Up made me think about these things which is empowering as I’ve long felt that the reason people don’t understand cultural, political, social, etc issues is because they don’t have the needed information.

This book was informative on several levels. The first section called “Work” talks about how the Michael J. Fox Foundation came to exist. In the second section “Politics” he discusses some of the advocating that he did for Stem Cell Research. Following are sections devoted to “Faith” and “Family” and the ways they’ve impacted his life both before and with PD. It was fascinating to learn more about all of these things and learn more about Michael J. Fox himself. To say his story is an inspiration would be an understatement!

I’m glad that I took the time to read this book. I really believe that we can learn a lot from reading as in some cases it will be as close as we can get to walking in someone else shoes. Perhaps if we all read up on things, then we would all be better for it, and the world would become a better place. But perhaps that is just “optimism + information = hope” to once again quote Christopher Reeve.

For more on these men checkout: https://www.christopherreeve.org/ and https://www.michaeljfox.org/. Also, happy birthday, Michael J. Fox!

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

Hope

“…it was an extraordinary gift for hope, a romantic readiness such as I have never found in any other person…” F Scott Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby

Since the beginning of self-isolation and social distancing to prevent the spread of COVID-19, I’ve been wanting to write; however, I’ve not been sure of what to write. Then, Friday it was nice out, and we went for a family walk. Before we came back in the house, I checked the rear of the house for storm damage from the previous night. That’s when I passed my flowerbed and saw the tiny bloom on my phlox. In that moment, I knew what to write about: hope.

As we are in the midst of a global pandemic, the media is full of gloom and doom. Yet if you look for it, there are signs of hope in the media. Here are some that I think need to be shared:

Two of the elderly at the nursing home in Washington where so many have died fully recovered.
Two of the people diagnosed in Kentucky have fully recovered (perhaps more by now)
People are doing the kindest things for the elderly in assisted living and nursing homes like putting up bird feeders outside their windows
People are finding alternate ways to visit while maintaining social distance
Andy Beshear is leading our state by showing how much he cares for the people
China (as of yesterday) has had no new mainland cases for 3 days
Last week, our local school district delivered 26,911 meals to school age children and elderly/at risk communities members
Government is coming together to help those facing unemployment, loss of health care, etc.
Groups of people are coming together to raise funds and deliver meals to those in need.

All of these example have helped me to have hope during this pandemic. I not only have hope for health, I also have hope that we will come out of this stronger. I have hope that we will come out of this as better people who are generally more caring. I have hope that our planet will come out in better shape because people are using less resources. I have hope that everyone else can see the silver lining in this cloud!

I’d love to know how you are seeing hope! Share in the comments!

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

Hope

“…it was an extraordinary gift for hope, a romantic readiness such as I have never found in any other person…” F Scott Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby

As we are in the midst of a global pandemic, the media is full of gloom and doom. Yet if you look for it, there are signs of hope in the media. Here are some that I think need to be shared:

Two of the elderly at the nursing home in Washington where so many have died fully recovered.
Two of the people diagnosed in Kentucky have fully recovered (perhaps more by now)
People are doing the kindest things for the elderly in assisted living and nursing homes like putting up bird feeders outside their windows
People are finding alternate ways to visit while maintaining social distance
Andy Beshear is leading our state by showing how much he cares for the people
China (as of yesterday) has had no new mainland cases for 3 days
Last week, our local school district delivered 26,911 meals to school age children and elderly/at risk communities members
Government is coming together to help those facing unemployment, loss of health care, etc.
Groups of people are coming together to raise funds and deliver meals to those in need.

I’d love to know how you are seeing hope! Share in the comments!

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

Frost for Thought

“Two roads diverged in a wood, and I took the one less traveled…” – – Robert Frost, “The Road Not Taken”

“He will not go behind his father’s saying,
And he likes having thought of it so well
He says again, ‘Good fences make good neighbors.” – – Robert Frost, “Mending Wall”

My day job – the one that supports the life I envision for me and my family – is that of a Junior English teacher. During the last trimester of the school year, we always cover 1900s American Literature. In preparing for that to begin, I’ve found myself with the words of Robert Frost stuck in my head. The quotes above are from two of his poems that I teach, and I usually find that they lead to good in class discussions. The discussion always becomes what is better, taking the road less traveled or doing things for the sake of tradition?

I’d love to say that anytime I come to a fork in the room that I take the road less traveled, but that would be a lie. The road less traveled often involves doing difficult tasks or trying new things with no guarantee of a desirable outcome. It is a road that can involve blood, sweat, and tears which is why it is often times easier to stay on the well trodden path. However, it can also be a road that has an arduous journey yet leads to the most abundant joy imaginable! When I think of the road less traveled like this, I immediately think of the pregnancy journey MrKisby and I went through and how perfect LikKsby is! I think of how much I love teaching, and how glad I am that I didn’t go into management like my first degree!

But there have been many times in life where I’ve taken the easy road; times in life where I’ve just followed tradition without questioning it. Sometimes it has definitely been easier to just fall into routines and follow the status quo. I think of times when you tell yourself things like “It’s okay that I’m overweight; it’s genetic” or “I can’t do this because of INSERT REASON.” There are definitely times when it is easier to just rebuild the wall than question why you’re doing it in the first place.

Reflecting over the two choices, I think it is good to have a personality that is a mix of both thought patterns. There are traditions that it is perfectly fine to not question because they are fun and harmless. It is perfectly okay to take the easy way out at times because seriously why make things harder if that causes stress? I think as long as you’re open to trying the road less taken and do so every once and again, then you’ve found the balance between.

And I think that’s a good way to live. That’s my Frost for thought. What do you think?

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

Following or Living?

I’m not perfect.

I make mistakes.

However, I truly believe Jeremiah 1:5 – “Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you. Before you were born, I set you apart.”

That said, I will be the first to say that though I’ve been Catholic for most of my life (there was a hiatus in my 20’s), I don’t always remember what the preacher is saying at Mass. Thus, I am truly shocked that today – Monday – I am still pondering yesterday’s sermon on the Heart of the Nation Mass (don’t judge me for watching Mass on YouTube…at least I’m watching!). The priest was talking about the Pharisees and how they were determined to follow the law. He then went on to discuss how Jesus didn’t just want people to follow the law; Jesus wanted people to live the law.

Specifically he mentioned the law of “Thou shalt not kill.” You can follow this law by not murdering. Simple enough. Living the law of “Thou shalt not kill”? Not as simple. If you think about it, every time we have a negative self deprecating thought, we are killing our spirit. Likewise, every time we say something negative about someone, we are killing their self-esteem. It is so easy to make comments such as “She’s gaining weight!” or “He looks like he’s on drugs!” We (society in general) have a tendency to think that if no one hears our negative comments, then it won’t impact them.

WRONG!

Eventually, the person who is having negative comments made about them is going to find out the comments are being made, and there is a very good chance that it is going to make them feel terrible! Their self-esteem might be damaged; their spirit might be killed. If I’m following the law, I didn’t break “Thou shalt not kill.” But if I’m living it? I sure did break it!

The more I thought about this scenario, I began to realize that the idea of “following or living” isn’t just applicable to laws. The idea is applicable to everyday life. My day job – the one that puts food on the table and keeps the shelter over our heads – is teaching. Every school day, I see kids who are following the actions and words of their peers because they want to feel like they have a place. Instead of living their own lives, they get caught up with what is deemed “cool” or “acceptable”. Sometimes they even lose sight of who they are in the process.

I see this with adults too – including myself at times – who want to follow all of what they are told without question. I do this A LOT with what LilKsby’s pediatrician tells us to do to the point that it drives other people bananas! In my life, I’ve never felt like I’m purposely “following” instead of “living”, but as creatures of habit it can be easy to get caught up in just “following”. It’s not intentional. It’s just easy.

That said, a lot of my goals for 2020 are very tied to “living” and not “following”. This year, I want to be more creative. I want to get in better shape. I want to blog more. I want to read a lot of books with LilKsby. I want to spend more time with MrKsby. I want to have purple hair and get my nose pierced even if people think it is weird for someone in their 30’s to want. I want to become the person I am destined to be spiritually, emotionally, and physically. In short? I want “LIVING” and not “FOLLOWING”!

Will it be hard? Yup!

Will it have obstacles? Yup!

Will it be worth it? HELL YES!

By the way…it will also involve music because there is a little girl in me who dreamed of singing, and she’s ready to be free! Luckily, I can carry a tune!

I know this blog has been a little all over the place (let’s face it, that’s how my brain works), but I hope that it inspires you! I hope that in 2020 and every other year that you will choose “living” over “following” and be who you were put on this earth to be! I believe that if we all choose “living” over “following”, then great things can happen!

XOXO,

The Great Kaysby

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